Hot Slut Of The Day!

The McDLT!

Back in the 1980s, McDonald’s came up with an extremely ingenious and highly-advanced way to keep the beef hot (wink wink) and the lettuce and tomatoes cool. They bragged about this special packaging that allowed them to achieve this scientific feat, and basically the special packaging was simply Mother Nature’s favorite thing that has ever existed: STYROFOAM! Groundbreaking.

The McDLT came out sometime in the 1980s, and it was like any other basic McDonald’s hamburger, only the beef-flavored chemical worm patty was kept in a different container than the lettuce-flavored chemical leaves and the tomato-flavored artificial discs. You had to put it together yourself.

Here’s a McDLT commercial starring a singing and dancing Jason Alexander who belts about hot beef, which strangely enough is the same thing I sing whenever absolutely anybody responds to me on Grindr. It’s a little weird that Jason went on to do Seinfeld, because you’d think he’d retire since nothing would ever come close to this career peak moment:

McDonald’s got rid of McDLT in 1998 and not because lazy bitches complained about having to do the laborious ass task of putting their burger together themselves. McDonald’s got rid of it after environmental groups got on their asses for using Styrofoam for their “special packaging“:

I’m not sure why Ronald McDonald didn’t just make another highly-advanced, heat-and-cold-keeping container out of something other than Styrofoam. But well, the good thing about eating something from McDonald’s that came in Styrofoam is that carcinogenic that leaked into your food probably killed whatever it is in that mess that causes your ass to explode with the shits. So there’s that!

Pics: Fandom