Florida Has Declared WWE An “Essential Business”

During this time of coronavirus, Florida knows exactly what is essential to them: luring in Spring Breakers and WRASSLIN! The WWE has been declared an “essential business” (it’s Florida, so that makes sense to me) and restarted live shows last night without an audience. So all the people obeying the stay-at-home order could gather together in someone’s living room and crack open a Natty Ice to enjoy a very essential service.

The New York Post says the mayor of Orange County, Jerry Demings, announced at a press briefing that he had spoken with Governor Ron DeSantis‘ office and they decided after “some conversation” that the WWE is important to the economy in Florida and should open up for business. This news came two days after everyone learned that  a WWE employee tested positive for COVID-19. Jerry explained his conversations with the Governor’s office:

“I think initially there was a review that was done. They were not initially deemed an essential business… With some conversation with the governor’s office regarding the governor’s order, they were deemed an essential business. So therefore they were allowed to remain open.”

WWE is filmed in Orlando and Winter Park. But stopped filming and aired pre-taped shows after the state’s stay-at-home order went into effect on April 1. WWE is super-pumped to be back, and in a statement, they said they are coming back with a closed set. But who will cheer when someone pretends to hit someone with a chair?!

“We believe it is now more important than ever to provide people with a diversion from these hard times. We are producing content on a closed set with only essential personnel in attendance following appropriate guidelines while taking additional precautions to ensure the health and wellness of our performers and staff.”

A gubernatorial spokesperson told ESPN that WWE and other “nationally viewed sports” were declared essential “because they are critical to Florida’s economy.”

Hear that? You thought The Gronk was important on a football team? That’s nothing. Working for the WWE he’s keeping the whole economy of Florida afloat! You thought joining professional wrestling was a post-football career step down? Honey, Gronk is a civil servant now.

Here’s some of WWE’s audience-less wrestling featuring a hot guy doing a dramatic monologue then pretending to beat up another hot guy. (Amen, Florida!) But I must say, without the audience this shit looks even more staged:

Pic: Instagram