During simpler times in early March, Katy Perry dramatically announced in a music video that she and Orlando Bloom are expecting a baby. Katy and Orly recently let us know that she’s having a girl on Instagram and that announcement is 100% less dramatic but 100% more gross. Personally, I miss the days of seeing Orlando’s banana boat roaming free atop the high seas. Now we get updates on their soon-to-be newborn via pictures of daddy wearing too much clothing.
Yesterday, Katy posted a startling and, quite frankly, unsettling picture on her Instagram of what appears to be Orlando’s mug covered in some kind of cream (I…just…). Page Six is reporting, and people are speculating, that the couple probably hosted a private gender reveal party and that the cream’s pinkish hue was the giveaway. I mean, also, Katy captioned the photo: “it’s a girl”. So, there you have it.
And this picture is probably porn to anyone whose kink is seeing a teeth grinder with a facial from Duncan Hines.
The baby will be Katy’s first, and Orlando’s second. He has a 9-year-old son with Miranda Kerr.
Neither Katy nor Orlando have confirmed an actual due date, but last month in an Instagram Live session, Katy made the characteristically Katy move by announcing:
“There’s a lot that will be happening this summer; not only will I be giving birth — literally — but also figuratively to something you guys have been waiting for,” alluding to her forthcoming album.
To recap: Katy and Orlando are still madly in love with each other. Orlando is still probably not masturbating anymore. Katy continues to threaten us with new music. Orlando still looks DILFy even with a face full of thick, pink cream. And they are having a girl baby.