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March 26, 2020 / Posted by:

Chokis, The Cheetos Delivery Chihuahua!

Antonio Munoz has been self-isolating in his house in Mexico, and while there isn’t an official country-wide lockdown yet, many are staying their asses inside and only going out for the essentials. And yes, since Britney Spears operates my thoughts and feelings, Cheetos is considered an essential. Antonio Munoz agrees, but instead of taking the risk of getting his lungs dry fucked by coronavirus, he sent his Chihuahua Chokis out to fetch him some Cheetos. Pictured above: Chokis throwing a “Bitch, do I look like fucking PostMates?” side-eye. Or maybe it’s a “Bitch, you’re really tossing me out into that virus-filled hellscape over some goddamn Cheetos?!” side-eye.

Antonio, who lives in Pesquería, Nuevo León, put up a Facebook post, claiming that after getting a craving for Cheetos, he got the idea to turn Chokis into a delivery pooch by slipping a note and money into Chokis’ collar before sending the Chihuahua off to a nearby store to fetch him some fake queso deliciousness. The note came with a warning that if the clerk tried to fucked with him, he’d bite a bitch. via Metro UK

‘Hello sir of the store, can you sell my dog ​​some orange – not red – Cheetos. In his collar he brings $20. If you don’t take good care of my dog, he will bite. From, the neighbor across the street’

And here’s the handwritten note the clerk got:

Now, if I pulled this foolery with my dog, he’d go down to the carniceria and get himself some carne asada before sneaking onto a Greyhound bus headed far away from my ass. But Senor Instacart ALLEGEDLY completed his mission and brought Antonio a little bag of Cheetos. Antonio took a picture of Chokis with Cheetos-in-mouth:

Antonio tells Metro UK that it’s safe, and that he’s sent Chokis out for a chips run two more times.

WHO claims that there’s no evidence that dogs can transmit COVID-19, but at least one dog in Hong Kong has caught it and died from it. So Chokis should really put on a tiny Hazmat suit, and his note needs to also say: “Put on some new gloves before touching my ass!” And since this is becoming a regular thing, Chokis needs to add a service fee, and also demand a tip from Antonio. And it better be a tri-trip!

Pics: Facebook

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