I think coronavirus has gotten a bad rap. Don’t run away! Hear me out. Why are we focusing on all the negative things coronavirus has done to us, instead of some of the positive things? For example, according to The Guardian, the trial for Johnny Depp’s libel suit against The Sun has been “adjourned to a later date” due to “the worldwide spread of Covid-19.” So next time you can’t pay your rent or you’re up all night worrying about how we’re all gonna die, remember that the coronavirus has also saved you from months of having to hear the excruciating details of Johnny and Amber Heard’s trainwreck marriage. Thanks to corona, no more severed finger and poop-stained sheets fueled nightmares for you!
Just to recap, this case is being tried in England and is against The Sun’s parent company, News Group Newspapers (NGN). Although Amber was scheduled to appear as a witness at this trial, it is separate from the ongoing $50 million defamation suit Johnny brought against Amber personally over the op-ed she wrote for the Washington Post. That suit was filed in the US and is presumably ongoing (it was postponed last November and rescheduled for August, corona pending) and for which Winona Ryder and Penelope Cruz recently provided testimony that Johnny’s a great guy in their books. Basically, Johnny’s never not suing somebody. He would probably sue the literal sun if he thought it was beaming at him sideways. The Guardian reports:
Johnny Depp’s libel case against the Sun over allegations he was violent and abusive towards his ex-wife Amber Heard, which was due to begin on Monday, has been adjourned to a later date.
Mr Justice Nicol made the announcement at the high court on Friday. “I have reached the reluctant conclusion that the trial does have to be adjourned,” he said.
The Pirates Of The Caribbean star, 56, is suing News Group Newspapers (NGN), the publishers of the Sun, and the newspaper’s executive editor, Dan Wootton, over an April 2018 article which referred to him as a “wife-beater”.
A two-week trial was due to begin in London on Monday, at which Depp, Heard and a number of Hollywood figures were expected to give evidence.
Because this case is such a hot pile of marital bed dog shit, NGN’s lawyers (speaking on behalf of Amber, their key witness) went off on Johnny calling him a coward for not showing up and reading the court a bunch of text messages that Johnny allegedly sent to his friend, talent agent Christian Carino (Lady Gaga’s ex).
Adam Wolanski QC, for NGN, said Depp wanted the trial to be adjourned “not because of the coronavirus, but because he cannot face the prospect of his lies about his relationship being exposed because he’s a coward and because he knows he’s going to lose”.
Wolanski told the court that Heard, 33, who is giving evidence in the Sun’s defence, was “prepared to move heaven and earth to make this trial happen and to come and give evidence”.
Lawyers for Depp told the court he was unable to attend the trial because he was in France, which is in lockdown because of the Covid-19 pandemic, and was also unable to give evidence via videolink.
Wolanski read out a text message Depp sent to Christian Carino in August 2016, in which he said of Heard: “She is begging for global humiliation. She is going to get it.”
Johnny also allegedly texted that Amber was a “gold-digging, low-level, dime-a-dozen, mushy, pointless” and “a 50-cent stripper.” He allegedly added “I would not touch her with a goddamn glove,” which was actually quite prescient, given the current circumstances. So consider this post a toilet paper hoard. It’s going to have to last you several months until one of Johnny’s many lawsuits starts back up again, and resumes dribbling out gross details about their shitty marriage. Thanks, corona!