Who Is February’s Hot Slut Of The Month?

March 6, 2020 / Posted by:

And February’s Hot Slut of the Month battle is a nostalgia explosion, featuring some exploding cankles pants. Perdita, the World’s Most Evil Cat, has become our first HSOTM of 2020, and now it’s time to vote on who will face her in the first round of the Hot Slut of the Year next year, if we make it to next year. Of course, the first three finalists got the most Facebook likes for the months, and I picked the low-hanging white rubber nutsack pants, because I’d be going against one of the religions I belong to, The Church of Teabagging, if I didn’t! Your choices for February are:

G.E.’s Digital Clock Radio, the important artifact from the 1980s that was in 9 out of 10 homes (don’t fact check me on that) and took years off of lives from the jolt of that static-y radio sound when the alarm went off.

The Fisher-Price Tape Recorder, the important artifact from the 1980s that was used by every extremely serious reporter as an extremely serious recording device in extremely serious interviews.

The Inchworm, the important artifact from the 1970s that made adults wonder, “That LSD I took four weeks ago is still at it?“, while watching a kid bounce up and down as they rode a dopey-eyed worm in a jaunty hat.

Ballbottoms, the soon-to-be important artifact from today that future fashions historians will note as the one piece of fashion that finally brought demure elegance to the industry, and that doctors at the ER currently closest to me will tell future med students, “And one time this gay guy was brought in after a ballsack pant leg got stuck in his mouth.

Voting is below. The winning HSOTM will be crowned next Friday, March 13!

Pic: eBay, eBay, TurnTrashIntoCash,Harikrishnan

 

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