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February 25, 2020 / Posted by:

The Fisher-Price Tape Recorder From The 80s!

The Fisher-Price Tape Recorder still exists today, because obviously, toddlers everywhere really want to pry their eyeballs from their iPad while plotting the rise of their TikTok empire to play with some artifact from ancient times. No, I’m sure there’s some retro hipster preschooler out there who rolls their eyes all snobby-like as the kids play with boring technology like an iPhone before adjusting their fedora and using their vintage Fisher-Price Tape Recorder to record their low-fi podcast episode on why Peppa Pig is so problematic. But the version of the Fisher-Price Tape Recorder I remember the most is obviously the iconic one in shades of shit.

After doing extensive research (read: trolling Google for 15 seconds before getting bored and somehow ending up on Postmates to see how long it’ll take for me to get Jack In The Box delivered for lunch), I learned that the Fisher-Price Tape Recorder first came out in 1980. It was the IT electronics color of the 1980s: brown. And it was so solid that it could be used as a murder weapon. It was also simpler than a Kardashian’s thought process. You could play a cassette on it and record your innermost thoughts (aka curse words) on it. It also came with this extremely important instructional tape:

The later models had a microphone, but please, microphones are for amateurs. Seriously, if I ever want to take my journalistic career to the next level by becoming a roving reporter (just call me Brenda DirtStarr), I’m going to use the Fisher-Price Tape Recorder. Every interview subject is going to ignore all of the other reporters with their fancy recorders and go straight to me, because with that brown brick of a recording device with me, I’d look like the seriousest ¬†of serious journalists. Yes, I said “seriousest.” That’s a serious journalist word!

Pic: Etsy

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