Night Crumbs

January 30, 2020 / Posted by:

Billy Porter, seen above in Popeyes x Ivy Park, is most likely laid up in the hospital with severe plastic poisoning of the mouth. Because he shoved his tongue all the way up the asses of the Kardashians by saying he was pleasantly surprised when he met them since he found them to be kind and down-to-earth. Oh, Billy, they’re about as down-to-earth as a snobby alien on Mars. But while Billy thought they were being nice, they were really hypnotizing him and eating his soul with their dead eyes. Yup, they got another one. Now Billy’s soul is sitting in a jar right next to Kathy Griffin’s soul and a big jar of lemons (Why do they always have to have a big jar of lemons?!) in Pimp Mama Kris’ lair  – Celebitchy

JLo left a gym in Miami looking every kind of glamorous, and I’m only saying that because she’s holding a Starbucks cup that looks like Liberace’s bedazzled dick – Lainey Gossip

Get into the dudes from 1917 awkwardly taking in Annie Murphy and Kelly Clarkson performing the track that should’ve swept the Grammys – Pajiba

This is probably going to lead to a redo of EltonJohn’s Candle in the Wind called Vagina Candle in the QueefOMG Blog

Bangs Ain’t For Everyone: The Selena Gomez Edition – Egotastic!

Don’t make any sudden moves, Margot Robbie! It looks like one of those black woolly bear caterpillars got really big and is crawling on your chichis! – Popoholic

Scat queen extraordinaire Jonathan Van Ness is already shilling a product that masks your caca fumes, and now he’s shilling a product that’ll give you the cacas – Towleroad

Ciara and Russell Wilson are expecting another baby – Just Jared


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