Rihanna managed to find one of the only fine ass billionaires on the planet and threw him away like a crumpled up napkin. That’s power. According to People, Rihanna and her Saudi businessman boyfriend of 3 years, Hassan Jameel, broke up for the most boring of reasons. A source simply said “they were not a good match.” Imaging finding a billionaire you actually wanted to fuck and not fucking every dime out of his solid gold dick until he eventually died of old age or went broke. This is why Rihanna stays a legend.
Obviously, Rihanna doesn’t need a man, not even a fuckable billionaire, (I cannot stress enough how rare they are. Even if their face is OK, their souls are usually rancid) because God blessed this child for having her own. And of course, we don’t know much about Hassan, but I’m going to have to trust that Rihanna wouldn’t have stayed with him for 3 years if he was a villain (on a sliding billionaire scale, naturally. Billionaires can kill, directly or indirectly, up to three poor people before they are designated as such), given her growth since you know who. And so, without much ado, Rihanna let him go. People reports:
A source close to the pair tells PEOPLE that they have gone their separate ways as they were not a good match.
“Their lives were too different and it was hard to maintain a relationship,” the insider tells PEOPLE.
I hope Jennifer Aniston sends Rihanna a little thank you note for diverting some of the Coochie Watch 2020 heat her way. Rihanna’s going to be very careful who she talks to in public because the coochie watchers are on a hair trigger these days. Before you know it, Riri’s going to go bump into Brad Pitt in line at Starbucks or some shit and it’ll be off to the races!