Hot Slut Of The Day!
Perdita, the World’s Worst Cat!
The Mitchell County Animal Rescue in Spruce Pine, North Carolina has made a bold claim. They claim that they are temporarily the home to the world’s worst cat. I can’t believe they said this out loud. Because every cat dreams of being named the world’s worst cat (fuck the Jellicle Choice!) and this will make every cat step up their game. Shit, I just saw a cat park a car right in front of my house when there’s spots all over the street. They’re really going for it. We’re done for now!
Mitchell County Animal Rescue put up a Facebook post, saying that Perdita (Why she’s gotta be Latina?) needs to go to a home with no children, dogs, other cats, and honestly, other living things since she will devour every inch of your soul to feed the demon that lives inside of her. So basically, if you’re Dracula, this pussy is for you. The staff said that they thought at first she was sick, but soon learned she’s just sick in the head.
Meet Perdita, not for the faint of heart. LIKES: staring into your soul until you feel as if you may never be cheerful again; the song Cat Scratch Fever, the movie Pet Cemetery (Church is her hero), jump scares (her specialty), lurking in dark corners, being queen of her domicile, fooling shelter staff into thinking she’s sick (vet agrees…she’s just a jerk) DISLIKES: the color pink, kittens (yuk they are so chipper), dogs, children, the Dixie Chicks, Disney movies, Christmas and last but NOT least…HUGS. She’s single and ready to be socially awkward with a socially awkward human who understands personal space. FREE ADOPTION
Brittany Taylor, the shelter’s office manager, said that when Perdita first came in, she was sweet, but that sweet act dropped the next day and her true colors came out. Her true colors being black (like the color of her heart) and red (the color of your blood after she swats you)!
“The next day, she was a grump. We thought something was hurting her, but it turns out she’s just a jerk. She pretends like she wants you to pet her and love on her. As soon as you pick her up, she starts growling. She will swat you. She’s just all-out awful.”
Brittany says that they tried to get cute pictures of Perdita but her death glare is permanent.
If I could, I would take Perdita, because it’d be nice to have something in the house that is a bigger dead-hearted life hater than me, but then I read this:
The 4-year-old domestic shorthair was saved by Mitchell County Animal Rescue in Spruce Pine, North Carolina, on Christmas Eve after she was abandoned because her previous owner died.
Coming up on Dateline NBC….
Pic: Mitchell County Animal Shelter