Open Post: Hosted By A Stolen Lobster Truck That Crashed Into Another Lobster Truck

A 29-year-old South Boston guy decided that things needed to get a little more Boston up in here and tried to steal a lobster truck with $10,000 worth of sweet lobster meat in it. This led local lobster truck heroes to say, “Not today, guy! We don’t steal lobsta trucks in Tom Brady country!“, before jumping into their own lobster truck, which led to a hot buttery lobster truck pursuit. The high speed lobster chase ended when the stolen lobster truck deliberately crashed into the other lobster truck, all while a baked bean truck silently judged.

According to Eater this all happened on Tuesday morning:

The thief hijacked the truck just past midnight on Tuesday morning, when the overnight crew at wholesale dealer Buy New England Lobsters were loading the vehicle with a shipment of fresh Boston lobster bound for Europe, Boston Magazine reports. According to a police report, employees at the lobster company’s warehouse immediately hopped into another lobster truck and gave chase, catching up with the suspect half a mile down the road, where he refused to stop and instead deliberately crashed his lobster truck into the second lobster truck.

What was the lobster thief planning to do with the $10,000 worth of lobster?! Lobster goes bad fast so he would have to unload it pretty quickly, and I’m not sure there’s a huge demand for black market lobster sold out of the trunk of a car in an alley way somewhere. Who am I fooling? Yes, there is.

Also, it turns out that this isn’t even the alleged lobster truck stealer’s first high speed Boston chase. Which is so dumb since Boston is filled with one way streets, terrible drivers, and the big dig has been happening for 200 years. I can barely navigate it during a normal commute, never mind TWO high speed chases. One involving a lobster truck.

The 29-year-old suspect, identified as a local South Boston man who has reportedly led the police on a car chase once before, was detained by the lobster company’s employees until law enforcement arrived to take him away. For his shellfish crime, he faces a number of charges, including receiving a stolen vehicle, assault and battery, and threats to commit harm.

Hopefully this guy will learn his lesson and stop robbing geographically stereotypical trucks. We need other states following suit, because you know some horny Florida alligator has been eyeing a truck full of meth ever since this happened.

Pic: Wenn.com