Bikini Model Demi Rose Defended Herself After Her Runway Walk Made Kendall Jenner Look Like Naomi Campbell

Since I graduated from Barbizon School of Modeling with honors* and was head of my runway walking class**,  I am an authority on the art of the catwalk right up there with my colleague Naomi Campbell, so I have earned the right to shake my head at British bikini model Demi Rose for strutting down the runway like a college student with severe diarrhea who while running to the dorm bathroom sees the dude she has a crush on in the hallway so is trying to keep it calm and sexy. Demi Rose’s awkward stumble walk made the rounds, and after everyone made fun of it, she said that she’s laughing too, but she’s not much of a runway model (girl, we know), her shoes were too big, and she was going through it emotionally.

Demi Rose and her wisdom tooth ass, which she got from exercise and diet and not from Kylie Jenner’s surgeon, made an appearance at the Oh Polly fashion show during Miami Fashion Week in July, but the video barely made the rounds this week. Never mind that the swimsuits look like they were designed by early-aughts frat boys whose vision board is made up of nothing but pics from a Frederick’s of Hollywood catalog and the 1999 AVN Awards (in other words ELEGANCE PERSONIFIED), Demi Rose got all the attention for her “half-asleep while stumbling to the bathroom in the dark” walk. In the video below, Demi walks at the 1:17 mark, the 2:58 mark, the 3:34 mark, and the end.

If you need a palate cleanser for Demi’s walk, jump to the 3:20 mark in that video, and take in Naomi Campbell’s Florida heir apparent stomping the nails out of that runway before that goddess greets her loyal subjects and knocks everyone out of their chairs by dropping it low and raising it high. You won’t see that kind of show at Chanel, bitch!

After the jokes about Demi’s walk went far and wide, she tweeted that nerves got her bad, her Payless Lucite shoes were too big, and she was dealing with the death of her mother.

All jokes aside yes I’m not the best runway model. I was super nervous, didn’t want to do it, my top went missing backstage, my shoes were too big for me in height and size not to mention I was dealing with personal issues loosing my parents, my mom a month before.

— Demi Rose 💕 (@DemiRoseMawby) November 13, 2019

In hindsight it was a really fun experience, showcasing my own collection which I was really proud of. I’m really grateful for all the opportunities I’ve got given. Thank you to those who support me!

— Demi Rose 💕 (@DemiRoseMawby) November 13, 2019

Demi Rose wasn’t lying about those shoes. Did Kanye make those?

Yes, Demi Rose’s runway walk had about as much energy and enthusiasm as me walking into the DMV without an appointment (shit, me walking into the DMV with an appointment too). But like Demi said, she didn’t want to do it and it was a tough time for her, and not only that, but you try walking and keeping it together as your coochie is munching on a bootleg Versace stripper onesie.

* everyone whose parents paid an extra $500 did

**everyone whose parents paid an extra $250 did

Pics: YouTube