The Popeyes chicken sandwich is back, so the combined blood pressure of the American public is about to skyrocket. Yes I know that the panic setting in over this chicken sandwich across the country was going to hurt America more than it’s political issues, but there can be a sigh of relief. The Sandwich is back! I mean, if you’re willing to wait in a long-ass line, it is.
Can you believe it’s been two months since people were killing their arteries with this high-calorie disaster? Well, the fun can begin again, because the sandwich is here and it’s here to stay. I wonder if this means that guy’s lawsuit is over? On Sunday the infamous Popeyes chicken sandwich, which even inspired it’s own “sexy” Halloween costume, made its return. Popeyes posted to Twitter to let the people know that like Jesus, The Sandwich has risen on a Sunday. Yes, this is a direct shot at Chick-Fil-A for being closed on the Lord’s Day.
Y’all…It’s Sunday. 🏃🏃♀️ pic.twitter.com/al3Qb05lAM
— Popeyes Chicken (@PopeyesChicken) November 3, 2019
And as expected with the re-release of this apparently orgasmically delicious sandwich people lost their minds. USA Today reports there were insane amounts of people and the line-ups were sometimes an hour long:
The Popeyes Chicken Sandwich returned today and
well this is what the line looked like…..
Guess we'll try again tomorrow 🙁 pic.twitter.com/9NYaVgtHqm
— KUSI News (@KUSINews) November 3, 2019
I just went to Popeyes for the chicken sandwich and they said it was an hour wait for it… TRIPPIN
— Kendall Milton (@therealkmilt) November 3, 2019
Line for that Popeyes Chicken Sandwich. pic.twitter.com/JGOSD4yIFg
— Regular Experiments Luni (@LUNI_TUNZ) November 3, 2019
Really?! For a sandwich?! That better make you people cum in your pants, because otherwise…the fuck?! You’re sitting in that much traffic for a $4 sandwich! Madness. But apparently I’m the insane one, as this sandwich is so goddamn good that it is literally worth standing around or idling in your car, or shanking a relative, or pushing an old lady down the stairs for:
— kyngofpop2 (@kyngofpop2) November 4, 2019
After waiting 35 mins for the Popeyes chicken sandwich I can say that the wait was worth it! It lived up to its hype! pic.twitter.com/6aCpiRF3tr
— Sarah Lehman 🧢 (@sarahlehman13) November 3, 2019
A spokesperson for Popeyes told CNN that this shit is back for good and so you can expect your blood pressure to never improve! Yay!
“We plan to offer it to our guests for a long time. We are confident that we’ll be able to meet the demand.”
I’m sure they will. And once again humanity shows that more people will show up to eat a chicken sandwich or sign-up to stay at the Taco Bell resort than they will go out and vote for who leads their country. Priorities: Humans really have them in order.