R. Kelly Missed Court Because Of A Toe Nail Infection
TMZ says that R. Kelly was absent from court the other day to deal with a nasty medical issue. No, not a rash of some kind (which is likely something he also deals with since he allegedly gave a girl the clap). R. Kelly was in his cell bed with a toe infection. Yuck, doesn’t he know that you’re supposed to wear flip-flops or duct tape shoes in the prison shower?! Did he not prepare for that life by watching Orange is the New Black?!
R. Kelly is currently awaiting trial in three states for different federal sex charges including prostitution, aggravated criminal sexual abuse, and much much more. He has so many crimes going on even Harvey Weinstein is saying, “At least I don’t have it as bad as that guy.”
Well, R. Kelly’s lawyer, Steven Greenberg, said that his client was not in Chicago’s federal court today because he had an infection and needed to get his whole toenail removed. Poor R. Kelly is now wearing a walking boot while he recovers from his likely prison-based infection and toe nail removal.
The hearing continued on with the lawyers of both sides doing their legal thangs–apparently it was mostly procedural–no defendants were there either. R. Kelly next will be in court in February. Hopefully his toe nail grows back by then. I should specify that he’ll be back in court in February to deal with his charges in Chicago. It’s unclear on when he’ll need to spend time in court rooms in New York or Minnesota, where he is also facing charges. Busy guy–Booked and busy, as they say!
But really, can you imagine this is your life? You have some disgusting toe nail infection that you contracted from the filthy prison showers which requires a full removal of the nail and still, that’s not the most disgusting thing about you today? Wow.