If you’re not following Jennifer Aniston on Instagram, what are you even doing with your life!? Two days ago, Jen made her debut on the platform, resulting in a tsunami of clicks powerful enough to cause her account to freeze up for part of the day. So many people followed Jen that she is currently a world record-holding actress, if not an Academy Award-winning one. According to The Guinness Book of World Records We Made Up to Sell Tickets To Our Crappy “Museums”, Jen holds the record for “fastest time to reach one million followers” on Instagram. She achieved this feat in just 5 hours, 16 minutes. Between this, her star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and a coveted spot at Madame Tussauds near the Zac Efron statue, Jen’s got Hollywood Blvd and Fisherman’s Wharf on lock. Oscar who?!
While it’s an impressive achievement considering how little actual work went into it (I’m sure all Jen had to do was shoot off a text to her assistant), she’s not the first person to hold the title this year. She’s not even the second. Prior to Jen’s grainy selfie debut, Prince Harry and Duchess Meghan held the record (5 hours, 45 minutes). And before them, K-Pop star Kang Daniel did it in 11 hours, 36 minutes, which might as well be an entire lifetime. I got a grey hair just thinking about it! Why watch paint dry when you could be watching lightning in a bottle??!!
— Neil Vorderman AKA nrsismad 💻 (@nrsismad) October 15, 2019
As of this writing, approximately 12 million hearts beat in sync with the pulse of Jennifer’s every move. So far, Jen has not disappointed. Just two short days after her debut, Jen’s posted for a second time, offering an unprecedented glimpse into her personal life. She must have gotten one of those new iPhones like the one her friend Ellen has, because the picture quality has improved immensely.
Wow! Who knew Jen was such an angry, tempestuous person. Looks like friendly, happy-go-lucky Jen was just a facade. To be honest, I thought Jen’s Instagram account was going to be a snooze fest filled with spon con and project promotion. But this, this changes everything!