Zoe Kravitz Is The New Catwoman
Seen above making the same “unbothered but keeping it sexy” face your cat makes while watching you get the heaves as you clean up the diarrhea it shat on the dining room rug for not greeting it the millisecond you got home, Zoe Kravitz will be the Catwoman to Robert Pattinson’s angsty, rich hipster millennial Batman in Matt Reeves‘ The Batman. When everyone found out that Catwoman would probably be in The Batman, there was a rumor that Vanessa Hudgens got the role (I mean, anybody who watched Rent Live knows that Vanessa can sound like a cat in heat getting viciously murdered), and then it was rumored that Matt Reeves was looking for a Zoe Kravitz-type (which is Hollywood for young, hot, and black). And now it looks like Matt Reeves got the ultimate Zoe Kravitz-type because he got Zoe Kravitz herself. And I think Sean Young just got the Guinness World Record for being the biggest robbery victim in history because she was ROBBED yet again!
Lupita Nyong’o, Tessa Thompson, Logan Browning, Gugu Mbatha-Raw, and Alexandra Shipp were supposedly on the not-so-short list to be Selina Kyle/Catwoman, but Variety, Deadline, The Wrap, and everybody else says that Zoe got the role and the deal is done. The Hollywood Reporter says that the names mentioned above weren’t in the final cut. They say that Zoe, Ana de Armas, Ella Balinska, and Eiza Gonzalez all read with RPattz a couple of weeks ago, and then it was narrowed down to two with Zoe getting the job over the weekend.
Filming is expected to start in the U.K in January, and if the world doesn’t end by June 21, 2021, that’s when you’ll be able to see Lisa Bonet and Lenny Kravitz’s daughter try to out-pout master pouter RPattz.
Jeffrey Wright is probably going to play Commissioner Gordon and Jonah Hill is either going to play The Penguin or The Riddler.
This won’t be the first time that Zoe has purred as Catwoman. She voiced Catwoman in The Lego Batman Movie. And Zoe wanted to audition for a small role for Christopher Nolan’s The Dark Knight, but was told she was “too urban.” From “too urban” to fucking Catwoman! Zoe will inherit the whip from Anne Hathaway who inherited it from Halle Berry who inherited it from Michelle Pfeiffer who inherited it from Eartha Kitt who inherited it from Lee Meriwether who inherited it from the OG Catwoman Julie Newmar. Camren Bicondova also played Catgirl on Gotham.
If Zoe needs help with learning how to fiercely strut her ass in heels as the circulation in her legs is cut off from sewed-into-leather pants, she can ask Daddy Lenny since he’s turned that shit into an art form. And Daddy Lenny is also skilled at knocking tricks over with a hot whip, but unlike all of us, Zoe probably doesn’t want to see that.
Pic: Wenn.com