I never thought I’d be saying this but Robert Sylvester Kelly has been treated unfairly by the system. TMZ reports that Robert, who last week was released from protective custody into the general population in MCC Chicago federal prison, has had a bench warrant issued against him for failing to show up for a hearing in Minnesota. In Minnesota, Robert is facing charges of “engaging in prostitution with someone under 18, and hiring/offering/agreeing to hire someone for sexual contact”, but he failed to appear because he was in custody in Chicago. Nevertheless, the judge issued the warrant anyway. Like I said, it’s unfair. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to finish writing my letter to the Nobel committee nominating that judge for a prize (maybe not the Peace Prize, does Nobel offer a Petty Prize?) for his extraordinary work in the field of fucking with Robert Sylvester Kelly.
According to TMZ:
Kelly has another big legal problem — a Minnesota judge just issued a bench warrant for his arrest because he was a no-show Thursday for a hearing, but this time it’s not the singer’s fault … it’s because he had no choice.
The Minnesota D.A.’s Office tells TMZ … prosecutors there are aware the federal authorities in the Northern District of Illinois are unwilling to give them access to Kelly until his federal case is resolved.
Robert’s attorney Steven Greenberg responded to the warrant saying, “they never came to get him, wtf was he supposed to do, telepathically transport himself?“, to which I say, did he try? I would like to see he made an effort. Maybe if he had presented the judge with some of those print outs you used to get when you tried and failed to send a fax back in the day, but for teleportation attempts, he would have been a little more lenient.
Pic: Cook County Department of Corrections