August’s Hot Slut Of The Month Is…
For the second time this year, a cat has taken a HSOTM title. But if you want to get technical, three more cats have taken the HSOTM title, because Mr. B has enough pussy meat and fur to make up three kitties.
Mr. B, also known as BeeJay, is our current reigning Hot Slut of the Month after flattening his competition hard. Although, he could flatten his competition without trying. He’d just have to put one 10-pound paw on ’em. So bow down to your new HSOTM overlord, and you better throw a treat his way (FYI: A “treat” to Mr. B is a 4-pound deep-fried catfish wrapped in lasagna noodles) while doing so, or else you’ll be the reason why the vet tells his human, “Well, Mr. B has gained (insert your weight here) and there seems to be a blood-curdling cry coming from his stomach area…”
Mr. B won with 39% of your votes, beating Loora Wang (28%), Vending Machine Raccoon (22%), and The Faux Wood Cassette Tape Holder (11%). Mr. B will now go on to the Hot Slut of the Year semi-finals next year.
After winning the hearts of the internet with his 26 pounds of love, Mr. B was adopted from Morris Animal Refuge in Philadelphia. Because Mr. B is an internet STAH now, his human has of course given him an Instagram stage to entertain his fans on. Here he is either wondering what the fuck that chonky bitch is looking at or wondering what that chonky bitch will taste like slathered with Friskies gravy.
And here he is minutes before his human went on HomeDepot.com to get prices on a new bathroom vanity.
Thank you to all who voted!
Pic: Instagram