Open Post: Hosted By Mariah Carey Letting Us Know That It’s Too Early For Christmas Music

September 5, 2019 / Posted by:

If you’re anything like me, once the summer heat starts to die down, you’re ready to break out the Santa hat and Christmas lights because the countdown has begun! And one of the best things about Christmas is CHRISTMAS MUSIC!! Wooo, let me contain myself, because we still have a while before we get there. Now, on the other hand, if you’re anything like Mariah Carey (AKA the giggest Christmas Queen since Lucy from Peanuts), you kind of want to pause before it’s time to do the Charleston in Bedford Falls. And she has no problem letting anyone, including American Idol alum Katharine McPhee, know she ain’t ready to start belting out any of her holiday classics….yet.

Apparently I’m not the only one ready for spiked eggnog, spiked cider and Christmas carols around the yule log (aka a pine tree scented blunt). While enjoying life with her new sugar daddy, Katharine’s apparently ready to start dreaming of sugar plums as well. Case in point, she took to her Twitter page recently for a car concert while belting out All I Want For Christmas Is You. Well, belting isn’t necessarily the truth. More like lip syncing for her Christmas cookies while Mariah does the real work. She even asked Mariah a very direct question; Is it time yet?

Katharine, I think it’s time for you to keep your damn eyes on the road before you hit a reindeer. But we do appreciate you keeping it 100% pure by not attempting to sing over Mariah. There will be plenty of Christmas karaoke parties where drunk office workers will sloppily sing into the microphone in the coming months. And some would agree that it’s a touch too early for candy canes.

Although it’s nice for members of the Twitter choir to remind Katharine it’s too early for her to join the Christmas Choir, Mariah got the final say. In a very quick response Mariah, who was probably on a beach somewhere half naked, addressed Katharine by reminding her we are still a few holidays away. And if Mariah says it’s too soon for the checks to start rolling in from everyone terrorizing ears by playing her Christmas hit over and over again, that’s saying everything.

I can co-sign this only because Mariah officially stated that the day after HALLOWEEN is the official start of Christmas Music Season. Now if you’ll excuse me I need to start practicing the breakdown at the end ‘O Holy Night’. Because what you didn’t know is that I am your drunk co-worker sloppily singing into the microphone. And my cats-dying-in-hot-grease vocals are my Christmas gift to you.


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