Hot Slut Of The Day!

August 26, 2019 / Posted by:

Marilyn Monroe Dog!

This morning, I woke my dog up by gently petting him, then I removed the luxurious cummerbund he pisses into (aka a diaper, he’s 17) before taking him outside to do his thing as I put his homemade food into a heart shape in his favorite eatin’ dish. This could mean only one thing. It’s just another fucking damn day, because I do that every day! But it is a special dog holiday. It’s International Dog Day, so we’re going to pay tribute to a genius dog who learned how to temporarily cool herself off while paying homage to Marilyn Monroe! Just call her Marilyn Monrover.

Who cares about that white dog turd of a live-action Lady and the Tramp movie when the only live-action movie starring a dog we need is The Seven-Year-Old Bitch starring Marilyn Monrover! Like many parts of the country, Dallas, TX has been hotter than the tips of Pimp Mama Kris’ devil horns when she cackles after finding out that one of her hos has spawned another Koven member. And while Zoey the dog was on a walk in the downtown area, she stopped over a vent and got ten jolts of relief from the dirty breezes cooling her off and lifting up her face fur, which looks like every selfie I’ve ever taken.

The white dress that Marilyn Monroe wore for the subway scene in The Seven Year Itch was sold at auction in 2011 for $4.6 million. But if it was put for auction today, it’d sell for $0 since it’s nothing but a pile of threads after falling apart from seeing Zoey do it better!

Pic: YouTube

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