Khloé Kardashian Says “Contouring” Is Why Her Nose Looks Wonky

Khloé Kardashian appeared in one of those Vogue videos where they do their makeup casually while grabbing at $90 moisturizers and products selected by the Condé Nast marketing teams while also already wearing ten layers of makeup? During the video, Khloé talks about her nose and alludes to how people think she had a nose job, saying sometimes she contours it way too much. And I’m sure that’s a part of it–I’m sure she’s getting used to contouring her nose, but that’s because that Whoville schnoz special is new. So it takes a minute to get used to, you know?

Khloe’s living accessory True Thompson makes a very short appearance. in the video, and we’re meant to believe she’s just running around in the room somewhere unsupervised but there is no way there isn’t an assistant or a nanny or something off-camera. As Khloé is doing her makeup, she talks about her nose. She says via People.

“So one of my favorite things is nose contour. But this does stress me out a little bit… In person and how cameras reflect and light, everything looks different. So sometimes I will contour my nose and in real life I think I look so good and then in some photos I look crazy!”

I don’t think it’s just the contour’s fault, I don’t know why you’re trying to lay blame solely on MAC Cosmetics (oooh, Kris Jenner is going to scold her at the next Koven sacrifice for not using Kim or Kylie’s toxic face paint) for this and not whoever put the scalpel to your face and made you look like you’re about to serve Jesus Juice at a sleepover at Neverland.

But that’s not the only part of Khloé that gets the contour treatment, she also hit her jawline:

“Especially after baby, when you have had a baby [and] you’re working on losing weight, and you’re still not losing that much weight. [In] your face you just feel so big. This I swear is like a magic eraser. I sit here and I’m just like, ‘Please go away! Come again another day. Please! Or just don’t come!’“

And there you have it: Beauty is a lie! Everything is a falsified construction and when you think someone is hot it’s probably just the filter they’re using, the angle of the light or the layer of makeup which is one lip-line away from Drag Queen-status. Ta-da!

Hopefully Khloé cools it on the “contouring” and her nose looks more normal from now on and the people of Whoville will stop looking for their lost First Lady.

Pic: YouTube