It looks like poor Terry Crews isn’t taking his meaty pecs under the sea and we aren’t going to see a topless Idris Elba in a flowy white beard wig, because there’s a report that Javier Bardem is going to be King Triton to Halle Bailey’s Ariel in the live-action The Little Mermaid, alongside Awkwafina as Scuttle, Jacob Tremblay as Flounder, Maybe Harry Styles as Prince Eric, and Maybe Melissa McCarthy as Ursula.
Ariel’s mom is also reportedly in this, and they’re in the process of casting that role, in case you’re wondering if Javier being Halle’s father is a Victor Garber + Whoopi Goldberg = Filipino son situation.
According to Variety:
Javier Bardem is in talks to play King Triton Disney’s live-action remake of “The Little Mermaid.”
Halle Bailey will portray the Ariel, a mermaid princess who dreams of being a human, while Melissa McCarthy is playing her evil aunt Ursula. Harry Styles is also in early talks to play Prince Eric.
Hmmm, I wonder if everyone who was so pissed off about Ariel being played by a black woman are going to pitch the same fit about her dad being a hot-ass Hispanic man. I mean, OF COURSE NOT, because you know those same people have had merman fantasies and Javier Bardem fantasies their whole life. As a white person, I can confirm this. But I am wondering in this version if when King Triton forbids Ariel from going to the surface because of his hate for humans, she hits him back with, “Um, you’re a Woody Allen stan, so you can’t say shit.”
Pic: New Line/Wenn.com