Open Post: Hosted By The Criminal Who Got Caught Because Of A Fart
The Kansas City Star says that there is one less criminal, a real smooth criminal, on the streets, and he was done in by his own fart. Yes, a man who was running from the 5-0 and hid in the woods might have gotten away with it were it not for his own uncontrollable intestinal tract. Someone get this guy some bismuth subsalicylate, quick!
Over the weekend a man in Liberty, Missouri was evading the law for possession of a controlled substance. So the man was hiding from the police who were scouring the woods for him. The man just couldn’t hold it and released the controlled substance (a fart) in his butt. Or maybe he thought it was going to be one of those silent but deadly farts. Either way, this dude let one rip. And his sphincter released so much air that the police looking for him just followed the sound and then probably followed the smell and then boom!
The Clay County Sheriff had their “cool social media post” for the month handed to them on a silver-platter:
If you’ve got a felony warrant for your arrest, the cops are looking for you and you pass gas so loud it gives up your hiding spot, you’re definitely having a 💩 day. #TuesdayThoughts 🚓 #ItHappened pic.twitter.com/BGJoPNKr3n
— Clay County Sheriff (@SheriffClayCo) July 9, 2019
The person was arrested over the weekend on a Clay County warrant for Possession of a Controlled Substance.
We’ve gotta give props to @LibertyMissouri Police for using their senses to sniff him out !
— Clay County Sheriff (@SheriffClayCo) July 9, 2019
Listen, this is highly relatable. Not running from the cops, but having an unruly stomach? Especially if I’ve had a coffee that day? Which I likely have since I’m a human with needs. Add in some high-stress and honey, my guts be gurgling! Poor guy, I hope he finds a way to calm his nerves in jail. I think his cellmates will find the uncontrollable-adrenaline-farts much less amusing than the cops did.
Pic: Twitter