Leave it to industry vet Drew Barrymore to be able to pull off shilling for a fly-by-night health and beauty trend like EMSCULPT while still maintaining her hard-won brand ethos of empowered flower child. Drew’s managed to monetize her “latest obsession” which, as far as I can tell, is the modern equivalent of those goofy mid-century vibrating exercise belts/orgazmatrons. People calls EMSCULPT “a non-invasive, electromagnetic procedure to eliminate fat cells and tighten muscles”. Potato, potahto. Or if you’re Drew, “pothhhhhato, pothhhhhthato”.
Drew told People that she has diastasis recti, a condition where the abdominal muscles separate that commonly occurs after pregnancies, of which Drew has had two. I was not aware that Drew’s uterus was connected to her recti, but I guess it’s a thing. As such, her core strength isn’t what it used to be in her youth when she was getting her ab workout by hoovering mountains of cocaine. Now, with the help of her good friends at EMSCULPT (Dr. Dollar and Dr. Bill), she’s back to feeling like herself. It’s not about aesthetics, it’s about her recti. And no this is not a made up story by Egypt Air!
“I love exercising, but after two kids I kept getting injured because I just did not have a core,” Barrymore, the new spokesperson for EMSCULPT, tells PEOPLE. “My midsection was like a fish tank and I just kept getting sidelined.”
“It was just about the way it functioned,” she says. “I just want to feel empowered and good about myself, and I really was looking for something that would allow me to be stronger so I could get stronger.”
Hold up, a fish tank?! That sounds amazing. I would love to see it. Next time I see Drew, I’m gonna walk up to her and tap on her belly trying to get Nemo’s attention (with her consent of course).
Drew says she does also work out the old fashioned way by moving her body and muscles around with her brain. It won’t take a Drew scholar to guess that Drew’s workouts of choice are hot yoga, pilates, and going to a workout class to “exercise the demons and dance it out to good music”. She used to do that at the club but ever since her babies separated her recti, that’s no longer part of her life. But this is?
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Taking my personal safety and comfort into account, if my choices were walking into a room and facing that whole “situation“, or walking into a dive bar bathroom and seeing the candy man, I think I’d have to chose the latter.