Duchess Meghan And Prince Hot Ginge Are Splitting From Their Joint Charity With Duchess Kate And Prince William
It’s been a minute since we heard about how Prince Hot Ginge and Prince William end family dinners trying to pull at each other’s non-hair while scrapping on top of the table as the Duchesses take off their borrowed-from-the-Princess-Diana-collection earrings in preparation to tap in and THE QUEEN shouts, “Whoop that trick!“, to whichever grandson she favors the most at the time (SPOILER ALERT: PHG. It’s always PHG). Meanwhile, Prince George takes bets at the kids’ table from Charlotte, Louis, Master Archie, and Prince Philip.
After a little break, the Battle of the Royal Bald Spots is back on, and in this round, the Fab Four is no more as Meghan and PHG are making moves to split from the Royal Foundation. “That’s right, bitches, skedaddle off and start the much more fitting HO-yal Foundation,” screamed Prince William, probably.
The Royal Foundation was set up in 2009 by William and PHG to run all their charitable ventures. Kate joined in 2011 after marrying into the royal family, and Meghan joined last year after her wedding. They did this Q&A for the Foundation in February 2018, and it’s then that the media gave them the title of the Fab Four:
The Sun claims that since William and PHG hated each other as much as hair hates the top of their heads, they are splitting things up to save their relationship. They split up houses, and PHG and Meghan moved to Frogwhore Cottage in the suburbs, and now they’re splitting up the Royal Foundation. A source said this:
“Things did get very bad between the brothers and they didn’t see each other privately for a number of months after the royal wedding. Certainly the animosity over status, money and Meghan meant that the split in their joint households had to be brought forward much more quickly than anticipated, so perhaps it was inevitable that their joint charity has to be split too.
Meghan and Harry want to do things differently to William and Kate. William is the future king and so is sometimes restricted in what he can do. The Sussexes want the flexibility of more commercial decisions. But the brothers’ relationship has vastly improved since their working lives have separated.”
Another source said Meghan and PHG want to slowly phase themselves out of the Royal Foundation, but Kate and William want to hit the fast forward button on shit:
“The Sussexes weren’t in a rush to make any changes, but the Cambridges were. However it’s a complex procedure and very sensitive. The Cambridges have definite constitutionally-bound roots, and now the Sussexes have married and started a family, with the Duchess being American, they have more freedom. Nothing will be done quickly and it’ll be a phased untangling of many of the joint initiatives, not an overnight chop”
The next board meeting for the Royal Foundation is on June 19, and that’s when the Fab Four is expected to announce that they’re no more.
Leaving the Royal Foundation will give Meghan and PHG the freedom to start their own charities. Might I suggest The Foundation For Needy Desperate American SkinnyFat Bloggers Hungry For Some British Ginger Dick? It’s a small, yet very important cause, that you never hear about (unless you read this blog, then you hear about it all the time since I go on and on and on about it).
But seriously, one person who is probably happy about Meghan and PHG breaking up with the Royal Foundation is whoever takes the minutes at meetings. Because this is the Foundation’s full name:
The Royal Foundation of The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge and The Duke and Duchess of Sussex
Think of all the paper and ink that was wasted on the minute-taker having to write that long ass name out each time. The hell kind of charitable foundation is that?!