Rihanna is a busy bee who keeps launching projects like makeup, underwear, movies, luxury goods that I most certainly can’t afford. And much to the dismay of her fans who keep screaming “WHEN WILL WE GET NEW MUSIC?!“, there’s a chance her next big project won’t be an album, but a pregnancy. Who thinks this? Star Magazine, that’s who. So of course there’s a chance this is just some very creative writing from someone who really wanted to picture RiRi with a BiBi. But a source swears that Rihanna is ready for the swollen ankles, heartburn, and tiny feet doing Tae Bo on her bladder, because she’s cutting back on booze. And when a woman cuts back on the booze, that obviously means she wants to get pregnant!
In a recent issue of Star (via Bossip), a source close to Rihanna claims that she’s getting serious about having a baby with her Saudi billionaire boyfriend of just about two years, Hassan Jameel. According to the source, Rihanna has been dropping baby prepping clues, like turning down alcohol and scaling back on the smoking. Of course, there is a chance Rihanna’s recent lifestyle change could just be the result of reading a detox blog or something. But the source would lead you to believe that Rihanna’s got mommy thoughts on the horizon.
“She’s a changed woman, and she can’t wait to be a mom.”
Bossip also points out that Rihanna posted a Bible quote about mothers to Instagram on Mother’s Day, as if that’s indicative of her secret plan to become one. If only the same mental gymnastics were applied to all holidays. “Rihanna just wished everyone a Happy Administrative Professionals Day on Twitter. Sources say RiRi gave her personal assistant a card…with directions to the nearest maternity store!”
Rihanna hasn’t said anything about this rumor, but she has spoken out about the numerous state-wide abortion bans that have been passed. Pitchfork reports that Rihanna has joined other artists like Lady Gaga, Kacey Musgraves, and Janelle Monáe to admonish the decision recently passed in Alabama.
take a look. these are the idiots making decisions for WOMEN in America.
Governor Kay Ivey…SHAME ON YOU!!!! pic.twitter.com/WuAjSVv6TH
— Rihanna (@rihanna) May 16, 2019
As for whether Rihanna is actually getting ready to be a Ri’Momma, I have no idea. That’s between her, Hassan, and the lonely bottle of Ciroc in her freezer. But if she decides that’s what she wants, then I know she can skip labor classes altogether. It’s easy: Inhale “Ooh na na,” exhale “Umbrella-ella-ella-eh-eh-eh.”