Who Is April’s Hot Slut Of The Month?

May 8, 2019 / Posted by:

Notice how they all won’t make eye-to-crotch contact with that denim diaper. It’s not a coincidence.

If you’re basing who to vote for in April’s Hot Slut of the Month battle royale on who possesses the most elegance (since an elegant site like Dlisted should have an elegant HSOTM winner), then your brain will be torn apart from trying to make a decision. Because each of this month’s HSOTM finalists are made up of equal parts elegance, magic, and gracefulness. The first three got the most Facebook likes, and the fourth was picked by me. Your choices for April are:

The Denim Diaper, the $315 pair of exquisite jean pussy stranglers from Y/Project which are the perfect way to show the world that you love to waste money and love the feeling of chaffed inner upper thighs.

The Utah Jazz Dandelion, the vision of brown cotton candy on steroids beauty who unknowingly turned a boring Utah Jazz game into a pageant of pure beauty.

The Plane-Delaying Flamingo, an attention whore flamingo who caused planes to stop when it crashed the tarmac in Mallorca, Spain and dusted the eyes of passengers with feathery glamour (basically, it won the Met Gala theme of camp a month before the Met Gala happened).

Joey, the unicorn sheep who was saved from death by two cases of beer. Need I say more?

Voting is below! The winning HSOTM will be announced on Monday, May 13th.


Pics: SSENSE, Twitter, Twitter, Facebook

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