PornHub Is Looking To Buy Tumblr

The Verge is reporting that PornHub is looking to buy Tumblr, the once-prominent time-waster of university age-gays and the still-prominent time-waster for Nazis. You may be cheering to yourself about the hope of female nipples  and dicks once more appearing on Tumblr after PornHub buys it, but beware! For there is a dark under-bellied truth to the Tumblr acquisition which speaks to a broader problem in the porn community. Yeah guys, this isn’t just big tits and jacking off: it’s a business.

Tumblr banned porn from its platform after getting some heat from the Apple App Store for its sordid content; specifically the spread of child porn. Tumblr took things allthe way and banned all porn before Christmas. All of the people who used Tumblr for porn-related purposes were devastated. Where would you be able to scroll through NSFW content? Leave gross questions in some over-sharing, sex-positive, exhibitionists ask box? The people were left wanting! And Tumblr felt the hit.

They lost millions of users after the porn ban. As they should! I loved scrolling through Tumblr casually in public and then randomly seeing an aggressive-looking dick-pic and quickly scrolling past, checking around to see if anyone else saw. You took that adrenaline rush from me!

So this word of PornHub looking to buy Tumblr should excite people like me, right? Verizon has allegedly been approached by companies recently who want to buy it, and PornHub’s Vice-President Corey Price told Buzzfeed News that they are “extremely interested” in buying Tumblr and “very much looking forward to one day restoring it to its former glory with NSFW content.” Hoorah! Porn is saved!

OR IS IT?

TechCrunch has the real tea, and it is bitter. PornHub is owned by MindGeek. MindGeek owns tons of porn streaming sites including YouPorn, RedTube, and GayTube. Chances are you’ve jerked it to MindGeek’s stuff. These porn tube sites are often-cited as problems for the porn industry thanks to the piracy rampant on them. And MindGeek’s sites have been accused of allowing users to re-upload pirated content days after they get removed. Buckle in for where it gets even more corrupt:

MindGeek also bought up some of the top porn production studios like Brazzers, Babes.com and Digital Playground. So chances really are that you’ve fapped to a MindGeek joint. So now MindGeek gets money from its authentic productions and gets money from streams from the pirated material on its tube sites, BUT! they don’t pay the performers a good cut! So MindGeek gets paid twice and then barely pays their talent for the creation. They’re essentially screwing the porn stars in a different way.

Time will tell if MindGeek acquires Tumblr, so we’ll have to wait and see if Tumblr once again becomes home to porn and Nazi propaganda instead of just the latter. Meanwhile, I hope you all think twice when you’re out there giving yourself some personal time. The porn industry obviously needs someone to come in there and try to spread some Democratic Socialism among that corrupt porn monopoly. They need their very own Bernie Sanders named Boneme Sanders. Feel the Bern, indeed.

Pic: PornHub.com/Tumblr.com