Hot Slut Of The Day!

May 3, 2019 / Posted by:

This vegan “lasagna“!

Usually when a food item gets the HSOTD stamp of approval, it’s the kind of food item that gives you diabetes of the eyes just from looking at it or causes your heart to scream for the defibrillator pads from one glance. But I am going against my morals and beliefs by honoring some healthy shit and solely because this has to be some magnificent trolling.

Vegan lasagna exists, of course, and is made with cardboard, cheese-flavored mashed tofu, and grass. Or regular lasagna noodles, tomato sauce, and some kind of vegan cheese. But Twitterer @AristaFbabi from Maryland tweeted that one of her co-workers brought in some “vegan” lasagna. And as everyone has pointed out, if this is lasagna then the phlegm ball I coughed up into the sink this morning is a gourmet green tea truffle. This looks like a neatly stacked salad made by Marie Kondo and joy is a thing it doesn’t spark. It’s just stacks of sliced tomatoes, some iceberg, and onions. It looks like a colony made up of the tomatoes, lettuce, and onions that were discarded from burgers at Chili’s by people who are not trying to eat anything healthy.

Even Stouffer’s social media intern popped in to declare their verdict about the lasagna-shaped salad.

Okay, but I don’t know if the shit that Stouffer’s sells counts as lasagna either.

The thing is, Peaches’ co-worker had to have been trolling and I applaud them for it. This is some shit that my mom wished she thought of to get us to eat our vegetables. Like she’d put this on the table and tell us it’s lasagna, and while my eyes would just see salad, my ears would hear the word “lasagna” and I’d slobber at the mouth and take a bite out of it as my mom cackled because she really fooled my dumbass. Yes, I’m that easy.

Pic: Twitter

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