Kanye West May Take His “Sunday Service” All The Way

April 25, 2019 / Posted by:

Kanye West brought his “Sunday Service” to Coachella on Easter Sunday after a tumultuous start. Kanye had originally pulled out of the festival because he wanted a huge-ass dome and Coachella was like: “Okay… but people need to pee somewhere? So we need space for that?” But Kanye didn’t care! He wanted the dome and he didn’t get it so he was out of there.

But then something came over him (ego and massive need for attention, obviously) and Kanye chose to return to Coachella, this time with a full religious experience and not just a show. Apparently the Kult of Kanye was a huge success. So much so that Kanye is thinking of doing more of them. Call poison control, because y’all done drunk the Kool-Aid (that Jonestown pun was not totally on purpose).

People reports that Kanye is really about it. And “it” is himself. He is getting ready to become the next Joel Osteen (or David Koresh) by bringing his kult service to the world. It was only a matter of time until the person calling himself Yeezus, who regularly compares himself to Jesus, and has the ego of a God–went out and created a church. Of course he loves religion; he thinks it’s about him! After all:

“Celebrities are the Jesuses of the future” – Book of Kanye, Verse 11 Line 16.

A source says:

“He is extremely passionate about his faith and wants to share it more regularly with people. He spends a lot of time studying and praying, and wants to share his journey…. Say what you want about Kanye, but he really does want to help people who need support. He understands brokenness and the need for healing, probably more than most people. He believes in the healing powers of music, but also believes that God can step in and heal people’s brokenness and their issues.”

Oh yeah, Kanye is going to heal you with his words and wisdom about how slavery is a choice and how Donald Trump will save us all with his red hats.

The source says that even though the hipsters and rich celebrities of Coachella have come to worship at his feet, Kanye hasn’t got enough and he wants other people to do the same. Regular people, who also have money and he can charge $50 for two pairs of socks:

“It was completely sincere. Everything about it was planned out, because he wanted to encourage and minister to people… He has talked about starting his own church, and what exactly that would be. It wouldn’t be the traditional, 3-hymns-and-a-sermon thing. Instead, it would be a way to point people to Jesus through the arts and through a community of people who love and care for each other. He also wants his kids to be raised in faith, and the best way for him to do that is to live out his faith.

The source does bless us with this knowledge: there aren’t any official plans in the works for this. Phew. I mean it’s a matter of time, but still, more time before the apocalypse is always appreciated. But still Kanye has a “vision” and it’s coming for us:

“Kanye has always said that his vision has always been for people from different backgrounds — races, ethnicities, beliefs, politics — to come together to worship God and love other people.”

A church of different religious beliefs? I mean, listen: I would love it. I don’t think Kanye is fully clear on how religion works, but I’m all about inclusion and if he wants to shoot for the stars: you go girl. I just know that regardless what this sets out to be it will end one way–the only way it ever ends: Kanye West screaming nonsense into a microphone.

Pic: Instagram

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