Above is a pic from Easter service yesterday of Duchess Kate laughing at something that leaped out of Prince Hot Ginge’s mouth, and if you believe the reports, he’s saying to her, “Bitch, I see you got your nasty slut of a man covering his dick so it won’t wander into the pussy of one of your friends again!”, while she laughs like, “Bitch, shouldn’t you be at home helping your wife pack her ugly clothes since we’re about to banish both of your asses from OUR kingdom!”
There were reports that PHG and Prince William still hate each other, and didn’t speak at all during Easter service (Duchess Meghan wasn’t there since she’s due to birth out the royal ginger baby any day now). That may have been because Prince William and his minions are reportedly working on a plan to send PHG and Duchess Meghan far, far away because he’s jealous of their fame.
The Sunday Times of London (via Page Six) heard from palace sources that royal advisers have been trying to figure out how to get PHG and Meghan out of the way before they become even more popular. The source said that PHG and Meghan were sent off to the suburbs to live at Frogmore Cottage, thinking that would ease tension between the brothers and keep them out of the limelight. But now they’re afraid that sending PHG and Meghan to the suburbs is going turn them into “a totally separate enterprise that nobody can get under control.” So advisers decided to send the two to another country. At first royal advisers thought of Canada and Australia, but shat on those ideas since PHG and Meghan would still be in the media all the time and the tabloids would still have easy access to them. So advisers mentioned Botswana.
PHG has a charity in Botswana and that’s where he and Meghan fell in love. The move is going to be spun that PHG and Meghan will be doing charity work in Africa and promote Britain.
Senior royal insiders say that whatever new role the couple might take on would have to be broad enough to appeal to both Harry and Meghan while capitalizing on their “rock star” status in a way that is attractive to the host country.
Prince William and his private secretary Simon Case believe that banishing PHG and Meghan to Africa is a good idea, and several of his minions practically have their tongue tips attached to his prostate because they say that PHG ain’t nothing but a fad! May their tongue tips stay stuck to Willy’s prostate FOREVER for thinking that wrong thought.
“In some ways it would suit William to get his brother out of the country for a few years and Meghan as far away as possible,” said one friend of the brothers.
“It’s a bit sad really,” said someone who knows both princes. “The wives don’t get on. The brothers have fallen out.”
Whatever public support there might be for Harry and Meghan, “People are telling William, ‘Don’t worry. Your influence will grow and Harry’s will fade,’ ” a source said. “This is peak Harry.”
The plan is supposedly to keep PHG and Meghan away for two to three years. The Daily Mail, however, says that PHG and Meghan will only be in Africa for six months and it’s still a few years away from happening. The Mail also says that PHG is into the idea and it’s something he’s wanted to do for a long time.
The Daily Mail understands that while there have been tensions between the princes and their wives Kate and Meghan, the idea of a foreign sabbatical is something Harry has wanted to pursue for many years, focusing on issues around conservation, the environment and education.
Buckingham Palace put out a statement that didn’t at all deny that PHG is going to bless the rains down in Africa with his freckled hotness.
“Any future plans for The Duke and Duchess are speculative at this stage. No decisions have been taken about future roles.”
This is some Game of Thrones meets Dynasty shit, and scheming to ship his brother off to Africa so that the spotlight can be all his is the most interesting thing that Prince Bald Blandie has ever done. But this is going to backfire on him when PHG and Meghan charm the people and animals of Africa, or whatever country they’re banished to, and form a giant army that will overtake Britain, giving them THE CROWN! But until then, since Africa is so sunny and hot, PHG is going to need a full-time minion to constantly slather SPF on his glorious thinning hair dome, and his people know where to find me (just check “address” on the restraining order they have against me).