Milla Jovovich is co-sleeping with her 11 year old, her 4 year old and her husband in a giant-ass bed (actually two giant ass beds pushed together) and I am….confused. As someone whose kids occasionally share a bed (like if we’re at a hotel or one of them is sick) and it’s my living NIGHTMARE. My kids kick and twitch more then a meth-outed Justin Bieber hugging his fans. Plus they don’t know who any of the Housewives are and I don’t have time to explain why Bethany Frankel is yelling again.
According to The Muse, Milla went on Wendy Williams’ show and discussed her sleep arrangements and why she keeps doing it.
Milla Jovovich’s sleeping arrangement—a Frankensteinian assemblage of mattresses that holds her entire family night after night—apparently isn’t broke, so she’s not fixing it. With a guffaw, she said on Wednesday’s episode of The Wendy Williams Show that she still sleeps in the same bed with her daughters, 11 and 4, and husband, Resident Evil director Paul W.S. Anderson.
In 2015, Jovovich made news when she discussed her familial bed on the website Romy & the Bunnies. “We have been co-sleeping for years with our daughter and I feel that it’s helped us so much to stay connected as a family,” she said during that interview.
She also claims 95 percent of the world does it, so we can all stop being Judge Judys about it.
“I feel like 95 percent of the world, people sleep together,” Jovovich said, ticking off Thailand, Indonesia, and Africa as places where families all sleep together.”
I’m not mathematician but that number feels high. Also this is America, Milla, in America we put our kids to bed in their rooms, so we can eat cookie dough and Cool Ranch Doritos, watch TV about dumpster fires making bad life choices while waiting for our president to tweet about what journalist he thinks is the hottest.
She also said she and her husband have once-a-week date nights at hotels because:
“Obviously when you share a bed, you gotta get creative about how you’re gonna make the next baby.”
Okay. Barf. Barf. Barf. I know I’m a grown up, but there’s something about parents talking about where they can take their next trip to PoundTown, because their kids sleep in the same bed. I blame my parents for that time they didn’t lock the door. Honestly, I can’t even watch R-rated movies with my parents because of the time I watched Unfaithful and during a sex scene, my dad looked me dead in the eye, yelled “YEAH!” and tried to high five me. So Diane Lane is dead to me.
But if that works for Milla Jovovich, great for her. I’m not going to do it because I live for the 2 hours I get to myself after the kids go to bed. But maybe her kids just watch better TV than mine?