Open Post: Hosted By Pete Davidson’s Huge Unicorn Tattoo

March 8, 2019 / Posted by:

Alert the media! Oh wait, I AM the media! I’ll just get right to it then. Somehow Pete Davidson has managed to make himself even less appealing than he already was by getting yet another ugly tattoo. I imagine Pete must earn a pretty decent salary at Saturday Night Live, but judging from the amount he apparently spends on weed and ink, he’ll probably be homeless by the end of the year and nobody will even know because he already looks homeless. I hope for his sake that his new partner in slime, Kate Beckinsale, footed the bill for his most recent future cover-up, which is a thick, veiny, uni-cock. That’s right, a horned cock. His artist says it’s a unicorn, but I know a cock when I see one.

Here’s Pete’s latest.

See, it’s a giant cock with eyes, a horn, and two gaping pee-pee holes. This appears the biggest piece he’s received in a long time. Maybe he was saving the space for someone really special in his life. Maybe Kate has a thing for dicks with two pee-pee holes. We don’t know, but this might be a tribute to her. Maybe she was the one who paid for a professional photographer to come in and document him getting the work done.

See, now this explains a lot actually, it makes more sense knowing that it was done in a dark, smoke filled room.


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