Open Post: Hosted By Gender Reveals Wreaking Havoc On Your Italian Feast

January 23, 2019 / Posted by:

Everyone’s Nona is pouring a triple-sized glass of Chianti because gender-reveal parties are taking a disgraceful bite out of what she spends all weekend making for Sunday dinner. Gender-reveal parties have truly gotten out of hand. There was the couple in Arizona who shot a target loaded with blue gun powder – and then sparked a wildfire that destroyed 45,000 acres of land and caused $8 million in damages. There were the morons who had an alligator eat blue or pink Jell-O…before the gator started getting close to a child at the party (don’t worry – the kid’s fine…the parents aren’t in the head). Hell, sometimes they even feature Bill Murray. Now there’s a company called Villa Italian Kitchen who will cater your gender-reveal party with gender-reveal lasagna. Mmmm pink ricotta and mozzarella – just like they do it in Rome!

The gender-reveal lasagna costs $139 and feeds 12. It also comes with a side of salad and garlic rolls, so at least there are carb options that don’t come doused in food coloring. Villa Italian Kitchen says this stuff is made to order, which I think just means they make some high school student working the afternoon shift take whatever frozen pasta goes with the gender of your kid and then orders them to reheat it by the time you’re ready to pick it up.

ABC 15 in Arizona says it gets better: if you post an Instagram with your lasagna-reveal party, you could even win a quarterly catering giveaway. Call me old fashioned, but I’d rather just do this by getting drunk at Olive Garden and telling my mom, “It’s girl,” sometime between the 14th and 15th.course of unlimited soup and breadsticks.

Pic: Villa Italian Kitchen

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