Just when you thought Fox News’ War on Christmas couldn’t get more embarrassing and/or hilarious, they have outdone themselves with their new claim; Gingerbread men are MEN. Point, blank and the period.
God, I feel dumber even typing this shit but here goes. Last night on Tucker Carlson‘s show, political analyst Tammy Bruce spoke out on the most important issue of 2018; folks referring to Gingerbread men as Gingerbread PEOPLE. My word! Whatever has happened to class and decorum in our racist, pussy grabbing society?? Scottish Parliament has banned the term “gingerbread men” from being used in their coffee shop due to sexism concerns, and Fox News ate that story up like it was made out of gingerbread.
Tammy, who is ready to throw hands with anyone who opposes her stance, referenced the gender neutrality with much disdain because she’s tired of living a life being bullied by political correctness. Here’s a clip of Tammy staking her claim as the champion of delicious dickless cookies that can’t speak up for themselves.
Tammy Bruce says cookies have a gender and "obviously they're men" pic.twitter.com/n7NWEzQrJc
— Madeline (@peltzmadeline) December 19, 2018
I don’t know who sounds worse; Tammy, or Tucker with his whole “we shouldn’t participate in our own spiritual neutering“. Bitch, it’s a damn cookie. You can call it a Gingerbread Dildo With Eyes if you want to because it’s not that serious. And oh, how Twitter reacted to this early Christmas gift of Tucker and Tammy recreating a lost scene from 1994’s Dumb and Dumber.
This is the ideal male body. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like. pic.twitter.com/gm7Pa6KNgO
— Mannheim Steamroller Season (@soundkitties) December 19, 2018
Things Fox does not get mad about:
*Russia undermining our democracy
*Human rights abuses against vulnerable people seeking asylum
Things Fox does worry about:
*cookie gender. https://t.co/kmMGvUtPPK
— Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg (@TheRaDR) December 19, 2018
Serving my children cookies with big veiny dicks to own the libs https://t.co/6i5nBbeZbT
— Vince Mancini (@VinceMancini) December 19, 2018
Someone please reach up and ring the bell for me because I need to get off at the next stop ASAP. And no need to ask which stop Tucker and Tammy are getting off at because clearly they’ll be taking this ride all the way to the nut house.