Jennifer Aniston has been lucky enough to be in the presence of Dolly Parton a lot lately as they promote their Netflix movie Dumplin’. Dolly even went as to say that Jen is her husband Carl Dean‘s first choice for a threesome. Jen must be riding an awfully high horse after receiving that biggest compliment of her entire life, so she was slightly delusional when she said that a Friends revival could turn into a Golden Girls reboot.
On The Late Late Show With James Corden the conversation drifted from Dumplin‘ over to Friends when James Corden brought up the $100 million that Netflix paid to keep all seasons streaming for a year. Jen looked like that news was a huge surprise (she actually looked like she was calculating how many dollar signs, if any, that would translate into her own bank account). James then went there and asked about a potential Friends revival, to which Jen said that the “boys” are just not that into it, but the girls are, so it would be more of a Golden Girls thing. that they’d do in 40 years.
Jen then showed that she’s just a huge Golden Girls poseur when she followed up with this exchange:
James: Which of the Golden Girls would you play? Would you be Rose, Blanche or Dorothy?
Jen: Uhhhh. Betty White. Which one is she?
James: Is that a Blanche? Is that a Rose? (Audience member confirms) You’d be Rose.
Jen: Well, do we have to? Maybe they’ll be three different Golden Girls. What if we’re Rachel, Phoebe and Monica as just Golden Girls.
Just as Dolly is an entity unto herself, so are Dorothy, Blanche, Sophia and Rose. One does not simply dust them under the carpet and reclaim their wicker thrones as their own.
And for the record, if the female Friends cast members ever did do a Golden Girls re-boot (and I hope to hell they don’t), the casting would be Phoebe as Rose (naturally, singing songs about St. Olaf on her guitar), Monica and Rachel tag teaming as Dorothy (two Beckys on “Roseanne” style- because it’d take two to match the greatness of Bea Arthur) and Joey Tribbiani in drag as Blanche because he’s the only one slutty enough to take the Devereaux crown.