Ed Sheeran’s Music Is Scientifically Proven To Be A Snooze Fest

November 16, 2018 / Posted by:

Most pediatricians recommended in the past trying to put your squealing baby to sleep with the soothing music of Beethoven or Mozart. Alas, thanks to bored researchers with way too much time on their hands, the Irish warbling about crack and hookers and boning of OG member of the Shire, Ed Sheeran, is also a near-guarantee to put your ass in a coma. Better luck next year, Bon Iver.

The New York Post says a study from the University of Sheffield states that 62% of people listen to music in order to rid their head of anxiety caused by work, how they’re going to pay for rent, or why that dude from Grindr never responded to a dick pic. The study included 545 musical artists, and – shock of shocks! – Ed was the second-most listened to for lyrical Sleepytime Tea, after Bach. Don’t worry, other bland white dudes. Rounding out the top six were Mozart, Brian Eno, Coldplay and then Chopin.

Classical music was unshockingly the most popular go-to for bedtime, but people also liked rock, pop, and acoustic. I guess that means everyone is pulling up a Starbucks Spotify playlist to pair with their Ambien. What is a little interesting, though, is that some people go to sleep with metal, house, or electronic music. So the next time you’re on acid at a Tiesto rager, kids, just remember: keep it quiet because you’re in the middle of someone’s lullabye!

Pic: Wenn.com

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