Kanye West Is Planning A Trip To The White House This Week
Going on live television and announcing how much he loves Donald Trump in the craziest way possible (while simultaneously pissing off many) has paid off for Kanye West. According to The New York Times, Kanye’s non-stop nonsense train will be pulling full steam ahead into 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue on Thursday.
Not only will Kanye be reunited with his BFF Trump, but he’s also going to meet with Trump’s son-in-law and possible android Jared Kushner. I bet Kim Kardashian is already giving Kanye pointers, like don’t forget to not smile if they take a picture, or don’t pick Toad if you decide to kill some time playing Mario Kart. Sarah Huckabee Sanders announced the news yesterday, saying:
“Kanye West is coming to the White House to have lunch with President Trump and he will also meet with Jared Kushner. Topics of discussions will include manufacturing resurgence in America, prison reform, how to prevent gang violence, and what can be done to reduce violence in Chicago.”
Kanye West has recently made it known he believes he’s the savior Chicago needs, and will be moving back there permanently to solve all the city’s problems.
A spokesperson for Kanye – it was Kanye, wasn’t it? – confirmed the news of his visit. The NYT tried to get a comment from the White House, but was met with no response. That’s probably because everyone at the White House is currently busy preparing for the arrival of Trump’s favorite unpaid publicist and cheerleader. What a magical day it will be. First they’ll bond over their favorite hat, followed by an overly aggressive handshake to establish dominance. Then lunch, which will be a variety of foods inspired by Kanye and Trump’s current biggest bullies. Like Peteloaf (“So salty, just like him“), and Two-faced Taylor Sandwiches (“You’ll love it at first, but soon it will turn your stomach“).