The man responsible for the answer to a 2028 $1000 category Jeopardy question…
A: “It’s the idiotic catch-phrase coined by this 12-time Olympic medalist for competitive swimming.”
Q: “What is ‘JEAH!'”, Alex?”
…is reportedly seeking treatment for issues with alcohol, according to TMZ. Ryan Lochte allegedly tried to kill his hotel room door in Newport Beach, CA on Thursday morning, and will be getting help for “alcohol addiction” according to his lawyer. That’s good to read, but will he get to hit the Jack in a Box drive-through first? You should be allowed some delicious if you’re going to try and start swearing off booze for the rest of your life. That must suck.
Ryan reportedly returned to his hotel room at 3 AM Thursday morning and must have thought the door was talking shit about him because he tried to kick it in. Hotel management called the cops, and Ryan managed to avoid getting put in the clink. This incident appears to have provided the impetus for Ryan to seek treatment.
“Ryan has been battling from alcohol addiction for many years and unfortunately it has become a destructive pattern for him,” Lochte’s lawyer, Jeff Ostrow tells us.
“He has acknowledged that he needs professional assistance to overcome his problem and will be getting help immediately. “
Ostrow went on to say that Lochte is determined to make it to the 2020 Olympics in Tokyo. In international news, Tokyo just sighed heavily upon reading that.
“Ryan knows that conquering this disease now is a must for him to avoid making future poor decisions, to be the best husband and father he can be, and if he wants to achieve his goal to return to dominance in the pool in his 5th Olympics in Tokyo in 2020.”
In 2016, Ryan and some fellow speedo jockeys got pinched briefly for allegedly treating a Brazilian gas station like Ryan treated his hotel room door. He was cleared of all charges in that situation but did receive a 10-month suspension from the U.S. Olympic Association.
Those sound like legit goals for Lochte and hopefully, he’ll be able to pen (why do I hear snickering?) a memoir about recovery called JEAH!: How I Won The Gold Medal In Sober Living one day.