Hot Slut Of The Day!

October 3, 2018 / Posted by:

The Dancing Coke Can!

My family may have been the only people alive who didn’t own the legendary dancing Coke can from the 80s (not to be confused with legendary dancing Coke-heads from the 80s that were Tony Montana and Elvira Hancock). But my friends and my mom’s friends had one, and I’d spend many a minute staring at it in a hypnotized state as it shook its flat aluminum ass (apologies for ass-shaming a can) to the beat. Since the dancing Coke can was a promo item put out by Coca-Cola in the 80s, there’s a very good chance that its moves hypnotized you into buying massive amounts of their sparkling Diabetes-inducing syrup. Whenever I’m at dinner with my mom and she throws me a burning look of judgement for ordering a Coke, I’m going to let her know that it’s not my fault. It’s her fault for taking me to her friend’s house where they had a dancing Coke can that hypnotized me into being a Coke-head for life!

Here’s a video that someone made of a “man” Coke can and a “lady” Coke can (Why the lady gotta be Diet?!) busting out some hot moves on each other to We No Speak Americano. They really should be busting out these moves on Dancing with the Stars. But then again, based on the current cast, they are way too famous for that mess.

Because I’m one of the only people on earth who never bought one, there’s many for sale on eBay. But if you’re a bitch like me and never had one and want one, just go up to any friend or relative of your choice and say, “So you know that Dancing Coke Can you put in a safe place in your garage because you think it might be worth something one day? Yeah, the real estate in your garage its taking up is worth ten times more than it, so can I have it?

Pic: Giphy

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