Henry Cavill May No Longer Be Superman

September 12, 2018 / Posted by:

The Hollywood Reporter is saying that Henry Cavill may be parting ways with Warner Bros. and will no longer be playing Superman. I guess his jaw was too square, his voice too loins-quakingly deep, his personality too dead (or not dead enough) and his body too muscular and perfect.

Although nothing is confirmed by either Warner Bros nor Henry’s camp, those three Superman movies, Man of Steel, Batman v. Superman and Justice League are said to be the only movies which will feature the hunky brit as the alien super hero who hides among us through the use of  non-prescription glasses.

Henry was supposed to make a cameo in the new Shazam! movie starring Zachary Levi, which coming out in April, but talks “broke down.” Warner Bros. is also moving their focus to a Supergirl movie. They’re planning on making it an origin story with a teen Supergirl (“Did someone say TEEN GIRL?” squealed Henry), which would apparently mean Henry is too old to appear since in the DC lore, Supergirl is older than Superman (depending which version you read because comic books have more incoherent storyline shifts than The Young & The Restless).

More reasons for Henry’s ousting is that Warner Bros. doesn’t plan on making any more solo Superman movies for at least a few years. A source explains: “Superman is like James Bond, and after a certain run you have to look at new actors”. Pftt, okay, good luck finding another person who is literally Superman in human form but with a British accent, but whatever (I’ve actually never seen a single Superman movie but he’s shirtless in them so I am highly offended by this development).
A source at Warner Bros. said that Shazam! fell through because of scheduling conflicts with the Netflix series The Witcher which Henry will be starring in, but another source suggests that he signed on for the show after not being able to reach a deal with Warner Bros. So the studio is trying to hit a “reset” button with their DC offerings. The new WarnerMedia CEO John Stankey said at an investor conference: “Some of our franchises, in particular at DC, we all think we can do better.”
Ben Affleck (who is also not expected to come back as Batman) and Henry may be leaving the DC universe but the other stars of Justice League (except for the black guy) are all set to star in more solo movies: Gal Gadot in Wonder Woman 1984 coming next year, Jason Momoa in Aquaman out in December and Ezra Miller is still set to star in a Flash movie which is supposed to start shooting early next year.
This is some real bullshit, if you ask me. Henry Cavill should play Superman forever! He should play anything that makes him take his shirt off in a fire and save innocents, and pick up planes, and fight with something so his muscles flex and bulge as sweat collects at his… …what was I talking about?
Pic: Warner Bros.
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