If you can believe a string of reports, it’s been all laughs and giggles at Buckingham Palace ever since Duchess Meghan arrived. She, Queen Elizabeth, and the corgis all wear matching “Pink Ladies” jackets and terrorize the outsiders of their clique by doing shit like putting Whoopee Cushions under Duchess Kate’s chair cushion at dinner. The Queen may have banned Meghan from eating her favorite food, but she has taken to her in other ways and feels bad for her opportunistic family blabbing to the British tabloids. While shit like that used to get your ass sent to the Tower of London, these days it just causes The Queen to hold Meghan close to her bosom and whisper sweet nothings of support.
Us Weekly makes it out to be like The Queen kicked off her heels and jumped up and down squealing, “I can’t believe THE Rachel Zane is in my quarters!!!” when Prince Harry first brought her around to meet the family. She has really taken to her new granddaughter-in-law during her very public dogging in the press by her father, Thomas Markle, according to one royal snitch:
“What may surprise some is just how supportive Her Majesty has been during the problems Meghan has faced with her family. Meghan is in a tough place, and the queen knows it’s completely out of Meghan’s hands. She has only sympathy for what’s been a difficult and distressing situation for her.”
Ever since Thomas got a direct phone line to The Sun and Piers Morgan, he’s been getting nothing but, “I’m sorry, but the number you’ve dialed is no longer in operation” from the royals. He hasn’t exactly taken it well, and another snitch makes it sound like Meghan won’t be making nice with his ass anytime soon:
“There’s no way she can have a relationship with him or even reach out to him to stop him from speaking. She knows he’ll record the conversation and sell it. She has high anxiety wondering if this will go on forever.”
The queen has noticeably more sympathy for Meghan than she ever did for Princess Diana, but that’s probably because they’re so different and Harry wanted Grammy to stick up for them:
“He wanted to make sure every family member knew that the queen supported the relationshipand how important it would be for Meghan, who’s from a very different background, to feel welcomed and supported.”
The queen is said to like how smart, polite and keen to learn Meghan is. I’m sure she got wind of that, tossed her a volume of cocktail recipes and barked, “Learn this! I’ll keep you busy!”