Everyone’s biggest gripe about the Oscars is usually how it takes 45 years to get to Meryl Streep feigning shock at being nominated for the millionth time for Best Actress. Well, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has heard the cries and are shortening the ceremony to strict three hours…at the expense of a few of the underwhelming categories. Best Documentary Short Subject, you in danger, gurl! They’ve also decided to desperately grasp for ratings by honoring movies that were popular. So Marvel should go ahead and rent a warehouse for all the Oscars they’re going to get.
Deadline says a lot happened this week at the Academy, which re-elected its president John Bailey to a second term. John must realize they have to cut the shit with awarding fish fuckery, aka The Shape Of Water, all the limelight because it’s causing viewers and advertisers to flee. He sent out a memo with Academy CEO Dawn Hudson to announce all the new changes.
First up is bringing the broadcast down to a strict three hours. That means some of the 24 categories will get announced during commercial breaks and edited and played later in the broadcast. They’ve also decided to “create a new category for outstanding achievement in popular film.”
They’re also going to move the air date of the awards to the beginning of February instead of later in the month. The calendar change isn’t going to happen until 2020, but the other parts will happen at the upcoming 2019 ceremony.
At least this means that this Thanksgiving, my family and I are going to stop fighting about Trump and will instead fight over whether my mom’s favorite Adam Sandler movie has a shot or if The Incredibles 2 will sleep. Or, you know, they’ll do what anyone with a working set of eyes will do and give it to Black Panther. Better luck next year, Meryl! I’m sure there will be Mamma Mia 18!