Angelina Jolie’s Divorce Lawyer Has Quit

August 4, 2018 / Posted by:

Some of you are probably asking yourselves “She only just quit?”. Come now, the lady probably lasted this long because she got ringside seats to the greatest celebrity divorce of the 21st century so far (I’m not counting Depp vs. Amber, because I don’t want Johnny “remodeling” my kitchen).

Instead we’re talking about the wanna-be spiritual successor to Mrs. White from Clue vs. the guy who allegedly got drunk on the tarmac before a family flight. TMZ claims that Angelina Jolie’s divorce lawyer, Laura Wasser, has quit that bitch – literally – because her client has been “unreasonable” when it comes to sharing custody of their children with ex Brad Pitt. Angelina reportedly doesn’t want Brad to see his kids until they turn 18, and only remember him enough to exchange awkward hugs and politely shake their heads at his offer of money (or kine bud).

Sources familiar with the matter say Angelina has been out for blood. As one source connected to Brad tells us, they believe she wants to kill any relationship he has with his kids. We’re told there has been a lot of screaming on Angie’s part. As one source said, “She’s fueled with anger and has gotten ridiculously unreasonable.”

The mention of being “fueled with anger” and “screaming” really paints a picture of Angie transforming into her dragon form and flying off to rip the feathered hair and denim jacket right off of 1960’s Manson-era Brad. But she’s not lawyer-less for good; Angelina has supposedly already hired another law firm. So Brad making nice for the kids’ sakes obviously is only working for the kids.

Laura Wasser supposedly prefers to steer her clients towards settlements and peaceful negotiation when it comes to co-parenting. So Laura escaping in an effort to avoid burning herself on the flames…flames on the sides of Angelina’s face makes sense at this juncture.


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