The “Charlie’s Angels” Reboot Has Found Its Angels

July 26, 2018 / Posted by:

When Charlie calls up his angels in the upcoming Charlie’s Angels reboot, he won’t hear Lupita Nyong’o purr “Good morning, Charlie” through the other end of the speaker receiver. But he will hear Kristen Stewart moan, “Why haven’t you, like, learned how to text yet. Like, no one uses the fucking phone anymore.

Last year it was rumored Lupita and Kristen were in talks to sign on to a Charlie’s Angels reboot directed by Elizabeth Banks. Negotiations must have fallen through with Lupita, because she’s not going to be an Angel. The Hollywood Reporter confirmed that the trio of crime-fighting lady detectives are Kristen Stewart, Ella Balinska, and Naomi Scott. Naomi is an English actress who played the Pink Ranger along side Elizabeth’s Rita Repulsa in the Power Rangers movie, as well as Princess Jasmine in Disney’s upcoming live-action Aladdin. Ella is a fairly new actress from the UK with a couple of British TV shows and films under her belt.

Along with directing, producing, and writing the latest draft of the script, Elizabeth will also play Bosley, who takes their orders from the never-seen Charlie. This will be the first time Bosley is played by a woman (Charlie’s Bosley’s have included David Doyle in the original TV series, Bill Murray and Bernie Mac in the film and sequel, and Ramón Rodríguez, in the failed ABC revival from 2011).

It might seem strange that two of the three angels will have British accents, but that’s on purpose. Elizabeth released a statement about the new Charlie’s Angels reboot, and apparently the Townsend Agency has franchised out overseas.

“Charlie’s Angels, for me, is one of the original brands to celebrate the empowered woman since its debut in the ’70s,” said Banks in a statement. “This film honors the legacy of Charles Townsend and his agency while introducing a new era of modern and global Angels. I couldn’t be more excited to work with Kristen, Naomi and Ella to bring this chapter to fans around the world.”

Sony is planning on releasing the film September 27th, 2019.

I wonder what kind of crimes Kristen and Co. will solve all over the world? Charlie’s Angels are an elite, discrete detective squad, and I assume that means they don’t come cheap. With that being said, they sound like the perfect operatives to help Duchess Meghan and Prince Harry figure out how to stop Thomas Markle from running his mouth.


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