Somebody Took A Pick Axe To Donald Trump’s Star On The Hollywood Walk Of Fame
Somebody has had it, and that somebody is all of us. Well, most of us. Every couple of weeks or so, Donald Trump says or does something egregiously awful or we learn about something he already did or said that was egregiously awful, or he’s caught in an egregiously awful lie, and we all hold our breath for a moment, hoping upon hope, that this is what finally does him in and then… nothing. Red, White and Blue balls for everyone! So when CNN got hold of one of the Michael Cohen pre-election, secret recordings of The Donald discussing a cash pay-off to kill a story about an alleged affair he had with Playboy Playmate Karen McDougal, people braced for impact.
Unfortunately, instead of hearing the exuberant strains of 20 Mariachi bands, the USC marching band and The Vienna Boys Choir all exalting together, we got one, dented sad trombone fart. Nothing (has) happened (yet). Well one of us had had enough with the bullshit and took it upon himself to brave the 3:00 AM Hollywood Blvd creep parade and take a pick axe to Donald Trump’s star on the Walk of Fame.
So this just happened again… somebody used a pick axe to destroy Donald Trump's star on the Walk of Fame. Still trying to learn more, but we know it's been vandalized multiple times, just never on this level. @NBCLA ?: Victor Park/Loudlabs pic.twitter.com/lzq7YrsSRV
— Jonathan Gonzalez (@JonathanNBCLA) July 25, 2018
Multiple people — including police — tell me a man walked up with a guitar case and pulled out the pick axe. Then, it’s believed, he called police himself to report it, but left the scene before they got here. Now, he’s nowhere to be found. @NBCLA pic.twitter.com/mJNh1dbO0J
— Jonathan Gonzalez (@JonathanNBCLA) July 25, 2018
Man, they tuned it up real good! This is really hitting him where it hurts too. According to The Hollywood reporter:
NBCLA reporter Jonathan Gonzalez tweeted, “Multiple people — including police — tell me a man walked up with a guitar case and pulled out the pickaxe. Then, it’s believed, he called police himself to report it, but left the scene before they got here. Now, he’s nowhere to be found.”
The Los Angeles Times reports that the man ended the call by saying “see you later” and about an hour later, walked into the Beverly Hills police station with a ghetto blaster on his shoulder playing “Rockit”, and insisted he would only turn himself in if he could be booked by Detective Axel Foley. Most of that is true! He is currently being interviewed by Judge Reinhold and is facing felony vandalism charges. And no banana in the tailpipe gag is gonna save him this time.
This isn’t the first time Trump’s star has been assailed with a sharp object. According to THR, 53-year-old James Lambert Otis took a jackhammer to it in 2016. It’s also been graffitied (with a swastika and a “mute” symbol, probably also a dick’n balls), spit on, kicked, stomped on, and people have encouraged their dogs to shit and piss all over it. Here’s what it looked like yesterday.
This is what Donald Trump’s star looked like yesterday. The other photos are today. It’s getting a lot of attention here at Hollywood and Highland. @NBCLA pic.twitter.com/TCbPWVPi3g
— Jonathan Gonzalez (@JonathanNBCLA) July 25, 2018
People are now taking pieces of the rubble from President Trump’s destroyed star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. @NBCLA pic.twitter.com/12RiUhgivu
— Sydney Kalich (@sydneykalich) July 25, 2018
In an attempt to be unbiased, there’s also this hot take.
Reports are coming in that someone has stolen President Donald Trump’s star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. pic.twitter.com/vgDVg9rRY4
— Greg Angel (@NewsGuyGreg) July 25, 2018
Ok, dude. He tried it though, didn’t he. As to that tape, who knows if anything will come of it. We’ve been told so many lies and seen so few consequences, that this one act of vandalism feels like the only retribution we are likely to see in the near future. But then again, I still have faith in my man Avenatti The Hottie to get the job done. Here’s what he had to say about the tape and Michael Cohen’s possible return from the dark-side.
If Mr. Cohen really wants to do the right thing, he must IMMEDIATELY: 1) release ALL OF THE TAPES; 2) release the rest of the evidence (texts and emails); 3) come clean about his conduct & that of Mr. Trump; and 4) state in writing he will not accept a pardon. NO MORE GAMES.
— Michael Avenatti (@MichaelAvenatti) July 25, 2018
Mr. Cohen, I’d do what he says. You wouldn’t want to see Avenatti when he’s angry. Be best, Cohen! But you can let Avenatti know that I’ve been a bad girl and could use a spanking.
Pic: Twitter