Hot Slut Of The Day!

Ellie is a big, beautiful mound of love and talent who’s got one working eye and is 13 years old. 13 years is apparently 68-ish in Beagle years. When I’m 68 years old, the only “treat” I’ll do a trick for is a 20-something Grindr hook-up who’s into grey pubes and has a grandpa fetish. But Ellie was gracious enough to flawlessly perform a new trick for a little food in the name of her human getting some YouTube views.

Ellie’s human Wes Hess doesn’t only have a hot rhyming name, but he’s also got an extremely talented pooch who learned a new trick for him. Wes put a treat in Ellie’s bowl, and taught her to  sit up on her hind legs when he says, “ready, set,” and to run for that treat when he spits out “go.” But Wes decided it’d be real funny to mess with an elder pooch who doesn’t have much goddamn time left for his trickery, and said “row” and “low” instead of “go.”  The look that Ellie throws at Wes when he says “row” and “low” is the same “don’t fuck with my emotions now” look I throw at a Popeye’s employee when they tell me they’re out of warmed up biscuits and it’s going to take 10 minutes. Being the very good and patient dog she is, Ellie waited until she heard “go” and went for it. Fuck World Cup, this is the only sport I care about!

And I’m sure that as a “thank you” for messing with her old ass and joints like that, Ellie gave her human a treat in the form of a dog caca in his shoe.

Pic: YouTube