Page Six reports that Ariana Grande has been spotted with her sixth and newest Pete Davisdon tattoo since the couple hooked up two months and began their nauseating TMI and tattoo crime spree. How do we know that Ariana’s new tattoo is a direct homage to her fiancee? It’s his 10 inch dick curling around her face. No, but it is his second most defining characteristic, and that’s the word “Pete” on her marrying finger.
Ariana’s manicurist shared a picture of her truly elegant Chanel nails and the new tattoo, which looks like it was done by a teenage tweaker using his mom’s 20 year old sewing needle (for repairing holes in socks) and a tube of dried out India ink. That tattoo says “Pete” as much as it also says “swede“, “wet” or “svelte“, which I’m guessing is some IKEA furniture that Ariana and Pete probably like to hump on with his aforementioned 10 inch cock and her “tight pussy“.
Ariana’s fans are confused about what it says too, so she confirmed on Twitter that it says “Pete”, or possibly “Arturo” which is a track of her album. Stop toying with our emotions!
DID SHE REALLY JUST OH MG GOD pic.twitter.com/kqTubHPeAA
— mia (@onelovesbutera) July 12, 2018
Ariana is not the one to be out-done by out other “IT” engaged couple of the moment, Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin, whom -air quotes- “apparently” is rocking a half a million dollar engagement ring. Whether we like it or not, we already know Justin is packing some heat in his tights. Can we expect a three legged race to the alter where Pete and Justin’s willies are tied together and we just kind of forget about the other two? This would be followed by a potato sack re-match a few months later where the finish line is the set of “Divorce Court“. I’m a big fan of shitty tattoos and bad rushed decisions, so for now I’m putting my money on Team Big Dick Energy for most likely to crash and burn in the hugest of fiery infernos.
Big Dick Energy is a helluva drug. BDE is dickmatization on crack. BDE is the bath salts to dickmatization’s peyote that leaves you licking the bag residue on Sunday morning while you cry into your lukewarm Bud Light watching the sunrise. So… you got a number for that BDE dealer?