An Anonymous Publicist’s Advice To Actresses: Don’t Date John Mayer!

July 1, 2018 / Posted by:

Page Six has an interview with an unnamed Hollywood publicist who says that his one piece of advice to female clients is to avoid John Mayer’s dick! Avoid it like the plague! Avoid it like you’re Jennifer Lawrence! Actually, this advice it probably null and void now because it’s not like starlets can get to Mayer’s dick when Andy Cohen is probably already on it!

John, who’s basically a walking issue of USsWeekly seeing as he’s dated Jessica Simpson, Jennifer Aniston, Taylor Swift, and Katy Perry, is known to be “manipulative,” according to the mysterious PR flack. This is the man who once publicly declared that he didn’t sleep with women of color because his dick was racist and yet still managed to get girls afterward. Of course, he’s manipulative!

“I would tell women in Hollywood to steer clear of him,” said one celebrity publicist. “He’s manipulative. He has a reputation . . . and it’s better to exercise caution dealing with anybody who kisses and tells.”

Oh, right. He tends to kiss and tell. And tell, and tell, and tell…

“I don’t think that’s a very honorable thing to do and I think that it’s hurtful,” said the publicist. “I’m sure women are very cautious after seeing what he’s done.”

John infamous for droning on about how much he liked fucking “sexual napalm” Jessica Simpson in a Playboy interview and then, in the same interview, ridiculing Aniston for wanting him to pay as much attention to her as he did to his phone. Oh, and you’ve probably heard that John’s also a Taylor Swift song. Dude’s got a big yap on him. And, according to another unnamed insider, it’s cost him.

“I know a well-known artist that was talking about his own career and shouted out: ‘I don’t want to turn into John Mayer! Look what happened to him. He had to go join the Grateful Dead because he talked too much about all his famous girlfriends,’ ” recalled one music bigwig.

“They stopped talking about his music and started talking about his reputation and girlfriends and personal life. That’s a crime if you’re a musician.”

Can you imagine that you’re an actress and it’s your first meeting with your new publicist and he goes “And the most important piece of advice I can give you? DON’T FUCK JOHN MAYER. I don’t care if he serenades you on a lute in front of a beach bonfire on a star-filled night and then tries to lay you down on a rose petal-strewn chaise lounge while telling you how beautiful you are both inside and out. You may as well just tape it and then run it on the Jumbotron during the Superbowl cuz’ that’s basically what happens after you get with that douche.”


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