When one of Bravo’s most terrifying creations, KKKim Zolciak, pried open her 120 pound plastic lips with a crowbar at the Real Housewives of Atlanta reunion and said that racism wasn’t a thing before social social (“I love the way Kim Zolciak thinks.” – Kanye West), I thought to myself that she should really take a quick little break from filling her lips and get her brain filled with some brain cells instead. (Although, I’m pretty sure you need a brain in the first place to do that.) Kim hasn’t gotten her head injected with brain cells yet, but she does get filler in her earlobes. You see, Kim is one of those unfortunates who was born with poor people earlobes (aka earlobes that can’t hold huge diamond earrings).
I guess the off-brand Barbie styling head from Big Lots never heard of a thing called “ear lobe stretching,” because her partner in plastic surgery, her daughter Brielle Biermann, tweeted the other day that her mom suffers from #richpeopleproblems since her diamonds are too heavy for her earlobes.
My mom gets filler in her ears because her diamond earrings are too heavy….. #richpeopleproblems
— Brielle Biermann (@BrielleZolciak) April 28, 2018
Earlobe filler has been a thing for a minute. Allure did an article on it earlier this year, saying that usually women over 40 get their earlobes fucked with fillers because their collagen has deteriorated and their lobes droop whenever they wear heavier earrings. Although I’m sure that The Dollar Tree Julie Masking doesn’t have that deteriorating collagen issue since she’s “39.”
A plastic surgeon named Dr. Wright Jones, who hasn’t worked on Kim’s lobes, tells Page Six that filler in the lobe costs about $500 to $600 for each ear, lasts about six months, and won’t work if you’ve got a big ole’ ear hole that’s gotten stretched out from getting fucked by so many hung earrings.
“The only caveat is that this is a temporary fix. The filler will go away. And the second thing is if your earlobe is severely stretched and the hole is very large then it’s not a good option because the fillers can only do so much to support the earrings. It’s a temporary fix and it’s something that’s relatively new. I’m not promoting that everyone go out and get filler in their ear just to support large earrings but if you have a special event or a special occasion and you want to wear some earrings and your earlobes are already really, really stretched then this is an option for you.”
Mini-Kim-Z tweeted that they’ve got #richpeopleproblems, but #arethosemessesreallyrichrich? Sure Kim gets checks from acting a mess on reality shit shows, whoring out caca tea on Instagram, and her skincare line (which she claims made $15 million last year). But Kim’s husband Kroy has gone from being a pro football player to her unpaid Uber driver, it looks like they spend money faster than they make it, and there’s been rumors that her bank accounts are as empty as her head. Well, if Kim really is going broke, then that’s good news for her earlobes since they’ll get relief when the repo man comes to collect those leased diamonds.